When AI Becomes a "Friend"

When AI Becomes a “Friend”: What Parents Need to Know About Teens Using ChatGPT and AI Tools

Artificial intelligence tools like ChatGPT and character-based chatbots are quickly becoming part of everyday life for tweens and teens. Many kids start using them for homework help or curiosity—but for some, these tools quietly shift into something else: a place to vent, seek advice, or feel understood.

As a parent coach, I want to be clear and grounded—not alarmist.

AI itself isn’t the enemy. Unsupervised, emotionally driven use is where the risk lives.

Recent reporting from NPR, CBS/60 Minutes, the Associated Press, CHOC Children’s Health, and Michigan Medicine highlights growing concerns about how children and teens are interacting with AI—and what can happen when those interactions go unchecked.

AI Doesn’t Understand Your Child—Even When It Sounds Like It Does

One of the most important things parents should understand is this:

AI does not think, feel, or care—no matter how human it sounds.

Chatbots generate responses based on patterns in data. They don’t understand emotions, safety, or long-term consequences. This matters because teens are still developing impulse control, emotional regulation, and decision-making skills.

When a child is lonely, anxious, curious, or struggling, an AI chatbot may respond in ways that feel validating—but aren’t actually safe or appropriate.

What Research Is Showing

Recent investigations have uncovered several concerning patterns:

• Many teens use AI for companionship, not just schoolwork. Some report daily use and long, emotionally charged conversations.

• Researchers posing as vulnerable teens were sometimes able to get AI systems to provide dangerous or inappropriate guidance—including content related to self-harm, disordered eating, substance use, or violence—after pushing past initial safety warnings.

• Some character-based chat platforms have been linked to sexually explicit or manipulative content involving minors, raising serious safety concerns.

• Health professionals warn that AI should never replace real emotional support, therapy, or trusted adult guidance—yet many teens are turning to chatbots instead of people.

This isn’t about blaming parents or shaming kids.

It’s about recognizing that AI is persuasive, accessible, and always available—which makes it especially powerful for young, developing minds.

When AI Use Becomes a Red Flag

Parents often ask, “How do I know when this is a problem?”

Here are some signs worth paying attention to:

• Your child prefers talking to AI over real people

• Increased secrecy around devices or late-night use

• Emotional withdrawal from family or friends

• Strong emotional attachment to a chatbot or “character”

• Using AI for advice about relationships, sex, or mental health

If something feels “off,” trust that instinct.

How Parents Can Respond Without Panic or Power Struggles

You don’t need to be a tech expert to guide your child safely.

1. Lead with curiosity, not fear

Ask open-ended questions:

• “What do you like about using AI?”

• “What kinds of things do you talk to it about?”

• “Has it ever said something confusing or uncomfortable?”

2. Set clear, calm boundaries

Especially around:

• Late-night use

• Private or secret conversations

• Emotional or mental health topics

Boundaries are not punishment—they’re protection.

3. Teach one key skill: critical thinking

Help your child understand that AI can sound confident and still be wrong.
Encourage fact-checking and real-world conversations.

4. Reinforce this message

“If something feels big, scary, or emotional—AI is not the place for that. A real human is.”

A Gentle but Important Bottom Line

AI tools can be helpful.

But they are not neutral, and they are not designed with your child’s emotional development in mind.

Kids don’t need less technology—they need more guidance, more connection, and more safe conversations at home.

If AI use has started creating tension, secrecy, or emotional distance in your family, you’re not failing. You’re noticing—and that matters.

Need Support?

I help parents of tweens and teens navigate modern challenges with clarity, confidence, and connection—without shame or fear-based parenting.

Elevate with Her Coaching LLC
📧 [email protected]

📱 972-433-5443