Help! I think my child is a bully!

Here are some signs that your child may be engaging in bullying.

• Referring to others in a negative way or disrespectfully.

• Bragging

• Being defiant at home or having a hostile attitude.

• Always wanting to be in control.

• Lacking empathy for others.

• Being aggressive towards you or other adults.

• Having new possessions such as money, phones, clothing with very vague explanation as to where the item came from.

• Breaking rules or testing the limits.

• Laughing at others when they get hurt or if something embarrassing happens.

• Problems with maintaining friendships.

• Bullying siblings at home. Having a temper, being impulsive or getting easily frustrated.

• Continually putting the blame on someone else.
  

  

  WHY???

  Sometimes bullies are being bullied. They are often looking for a sense of control. Sometimes it is peer pressure. In order to be popular, they may feel like they need to make jokes at the expense of someone else. If they are being inappropriately disciplined at home, sometimes a child will act out on others. If a child has been a witness to ongoing family violence, again, they too will act this out. A child may be experiencing emotional difficulties. A child may not have the ability to empathize. This may need to be taught or modeled. There may be a lack of understanding of social norms due to a learning disability or a lack of appropriate support. Permissive parenting can also be a contributing factor.

  WHAT DO I DO??? How can I stop this?
  

  If the school hasn’t contacted you, be proactive and contact them. Teachers and counselors work with your child daily and may be able to give further information about what is going on. They may be able to help you with practical tips. They can advise you of their anti-bullying policies. Continue to have regular communication between you and the school and be sure to encourage working together to respond to this. It is highly important that when you talk with your child, you remain calm. Find out what you can about the behaviors. When it happens? Where it happens? How long has it been happening? Explain that being a bystander is also a type of bullying. If you don’t know there friends, I advise you to get to know them.